When You Feel Alone
Hello friend! Have you ever felt alone in your battle with mental illness? I have. I felt alone in my battle with bipolar disorder when I lived in a small town in Arizona in my mid-to-late-thirties because I didn’t know anyone else who also had a mental illness, and I longed to know others with bipolar disorder who struggled as I did.
Published studies report that about twenty-six percent of all U.S. adults have a mental illness. According to my psychiatric nurse practitioner, the percentage is far greater now.
OK, that’s a statistic. Yes, there are not just a few of us. But what does that mean for you?
Number one, it means that there are others out there that have internal battles that are similar to yours, maybe not exactly like yours though because everyone has a different DNA and different circumstances. People struggle with anxiety disorders, depression, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and others. Maybe you have one of these or some other mental health issue.
Number two, you have a need for community. People who love and accept you. If you’re feeling isolated, are you able to reach out to someone for connection or companionship? Maybe you’ve tried and had setback after setback. Maybe you’re unable to leave your house, hold down a job, and picking up the phone seems impossible to you. Is there someone you can take a step to text and ask for prayer?
I understand that in some circumstances you may be unable to do so, but if at all possible, seek out a local church to attend, and go their website to find out if there is a small group to be a part of.
Back when I lived in Arizona, I thrived even though I didn’t have a mental illness support group because I was surrounded by a loving church community where I was involved in small group Bible studies and had friends who prayed for me.
What about seeking out someone older and more mature than you? They may be able to offer support when you feel so depressed that you feel like there’s no one around to reach out to you. When I suffered from a mental health crisis in my late forties, my friend, Marge came to my home with a loaf of homemade banana bread and sat with me. I don’t remember what we talked about, but her simple kindness and presence touched me deeply.
You don’t need to feel like you will just be a burden either when you seek out friendships. You have great worth and value and something unique that you offer others that no one else can. You will often find that your effort to reach out to others for help, and also, to offer your own contribution of simply who you are will bring satisfaction and comfort and support—support to live your life with less isolation.
Number three, God loves you and longs to be close to you. Jesus came to this earth to draw others to a relationship with Him.
After He died on the cross to take away our sin and our alienation from God, and rose from the dead, He gave his disciples a promise: “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
That means, if you have believed in Jesus to give you eternal life, He is with you forever. When you feel no one else cares or understands you, He does. You are never truly alone. This promise means a lot to me and helps me when I feel like I’m fighting battles all by myself.
If you are new to the faith, I recommend that you get to know Jesus through reading His word. I especially like the gospels (my favorite is the gospel of John) and the book of Philippians in the New Testament. I like to read scripture on my Bible App on my phone because I can read it anywhere. I use the ESV Bible App.
Listen to Christian songs that bring words of encouragement to your soul. Sometimes that fills the empty spaces I feel during times when I am alone.
So, take comfort in the fact that there are so many people in this world like you who have a mental illness. Recognize that you have such a need for community that it’s crucial to reach out and contact someone. Pray that God will open a door for a relationship with someone you can trust. And be assured that God loves you so much that He wants you to know that Jesus is with you always.
*To locate others with a mental illness in your area, an organization called National Alliance for Mental Illness (NAMI) offers local support groups. Check them out online.
-Marilyn